MLB New York Yankees

Who Are Yankees Fans Supposed to Root For in the ALCS?

Written by Noah Gagnon

Let’s start off by establishing the fact that any legitimate Yankee fan cannot in good consciousness watch one second of the ALCS. Tampa’s now up 2-0 and I don’t know what I want to happen.These are our mortal enemies competing for a pennant that we didn’t even have the competency to qualify for, so if you can watch that without wanting to gouge your eyeballs out with a fish hook, you’re not a supporter of the Bronx Bombers. Unfortunately, all of New York’s wishes that both teams test positive for COVID did not come true, and the series is being played as scheduled. So, who do we hope wins?

You can’t root for the cheating, scumbag, integrity-less Astros, can you?  This is a team that cheated to absolutely piss on the hopes and dreams of Yankees fans two times in the last four years, and then had the audacity to claim their title as legitimate. I don’t care if the Houston Astros win 60 titles in the next 60 years, you will NEVER convince me that Jose Altuve wasn’t wearing a buzzer when he hit that nuke off Chapman. Morally, could you ever forgive yourself if an Alex Bregman at-bat went by without wishing for a fastball to come at his helmet? I certainly couldn’t, so rooting for the ‘Stros really isn’t an option here.

So do you root for the Rays? I don’t know, dude. Like, in good consciousness could you really sit down and root for this soft, fanless expansion team that plays in a stadium with the electricity of a bike-tire? Not to mention the fact that they brawled multiple times with the Yankees this season, and every time Willy Adames comes on the screen I’m motivated to throw a boot at my television. So, no I will not be rooting for this fruity Rays team either, and quite frankly I hope they have to deal with a cheating scandal of their own in the near future. 

After talking (or writing) through it I guess you really can’t support either of these non-pinstripe wearing franchises in good faith. Screw this, dude. Maybe you just root for an asteroid to hit near the stadium, or terrestrial downpours in San Diego every day until April. Perhaps you wake up in the morning hoping for a syphilis outbreak in both locker rooms before game 3, really anything that prohibits a winner of this series from being crowned would be great. 

About the author

Noah Gagnon

19-year-old student. MMA Enthusiast. 2014 Bedminster Middle School Boys Mile Run Second Place. BJJ White Belt. Kind Guy.