Blackberry is ending service on its mobile devices

Written by Noah Gagnon

Heartbreaking news out of wherever the hell blackberry is located out of, as they’re set to end service on all of their mobile devices today. I’d say it’s the end of an era, but I’m pretty sure the era ended the second the iPhone dropped, so this is honestly long overdue.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but wasn’t Obama using one of these things for a little while there? I’m pretty sure it was for security or something. He’s probably pretty heated right now, no? Guy wakes up in the morning, goes to check a few emails (if you can even do that on there), and all the sudden the damn thing won’t turn on. If you’re him, do you suspect some sort of Russian interferance, or do you just instantly know that Blackberry decided to call it quits. You’ve had to have known this was coming, right?

Unsurprisingly, the stock took a bit of a hit today, but honestly, props to them for still being a publicly-traded company. You’d think that it would be hard to stay afloat when you’ve gone a decade without releasing a culturally relevant product, but they’ve still got a market cap of 5B, so props to them on that. Apparently, they do cyber security now. So if you’re ever getting hacked give Blackberry a ring.

The true tragedy here is that I’ll have forever lost my chance at recovering my brick-breaker high score off my dad’s old BB. You don’t have to believe me, but I’m telling you, it was an astronomical score. Complete insanity. Potentially in the top percentile globally. Maybe they can just keep the brick-breaker feature going?

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About the author

Noah Gagnon

19-year-old student. MMA Enthusiast. 2014 Bedminster Middle School Boys Mile Run Second Place. BJJ White Belt. Kind Guy.