5 Men, 10,0000 Flying Squirrels

Written by Jleibl

Now, take a long look at these beautiful mug shots. Are these faces of men who would poach flying squirrels and sell them on the black market to make over $200,000 in 3 years? Why yes, yes they are.

These 5 men (now up to 7), have been running an illegal flying squirrel ring for 3 years now, where they would illegally hunt these creatures I didn’t know were even real, having mules run them by truck, and then selling them overseas to the highest bidder. Honestly, 2020 is all making sense now. A single bat being the cause of a global pandemic and now flying squirrels being distributed all over the world. We truly are living in a simulation.

If you are sitting here still wondering what the hell is a flying squirrel, here is the majestic creature in it’s natural habitat.

The best way I can describe this thing, it’s a squirrel that didn’t get circumcised so this little man can spread his foreskin and fly.

If you are sitting at home trying to figure your life out, might as well go roughneck it like these 5 glorious men pictured above and reel in $200,000 in just under 3 years and live your best life. I think it goes without saying, just don’t get caught.

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